logs | —i play the heroine, i play to their sympathies.

from here.

[ a couple of hours before noon, Sakura receives a message that says simply: I'm on my way, Dottoressa! (｡･∀･)ﾉﾞ —and shortly after, a petite young lady with a head of golden-blonde hair peeks in through the front flap of the medical tent. even from a quick glance, Rudbeckia seems very much like the princess she introduced herself as: dressed in fine fabrics with a voluminous skirt, decorated in ruffles and bows like a doll, she has the look about her of a girl who has never done anything more strenuous than lift a teacup. even the way she walks is delicate, each step as careful as a dancer's. ]

Hello, Dottoressa? [ she lingers by the entrance, fidgeting nervously with her skirts. ] It's Rudbeckia... I hope I'm not interrupting.

Edited 2022-10-10 00:44 (UTC)

planning • event log

fujiwara hibiki
fukawa toko
zagreus
set
jonas ward
felix hugo fraldarius
noctis lucis caelum

Edited 2022-11-10 12:28 (UTC)

[ they've been running for too long. how long isn't at all a relevant question; whether it's been five minutes or fifteen, it's too much time spent in this godforsaken maze that her Shadow walked her into. (and it so rarely rears its head, she had been worrying that perhaps she's been too at ease here, that she needs to stay aware of her surroundings and then all of a sudden she'd thought: so maybe I need a reminder, and her feet had just moved—) she had been relieved, briefly, to come across someone else from their particular group of Restless, except in the end it turns out there isn't much comfort to be had in just having another person running alongside you.

besides, she's dead weight. even now, Kaito has had to stop for her sake, the two of them having found a corner to hide in while Ruby catches her breath. ]

S-Sorry, Signor Kaito...

[ this body has hardly ever been what anyone could call robust, but—she was still in the throes of that damn chronic illness when she died, and it seems like maybe she hasn't quite recovered yet, even though that doesn't make any sense because she's dead. why is she still sick if she's dead? how the hell is that fair? her head swims and every breath burns inside her lungs. shouldn't she just give up? she'll go to the bastard chasing them down and she'll cry and grovel and let him win, and whatever he decides to do with his victory, at least this will be over. he isn't going to kill her. he's just a bully. ]

You don't have to wait for me, it's okay. [ she's still panting, slumped over in a heap of skirts and blonde curls. ] I'll be fine.

Edited 2022-10-09 13:49 (UTC)

[ it's strange: the festival is so loud, and yet Rudbeckia can't hear a thing. she must have been able to hear it earlier, she had been part of the noise herself, talked and laughed and danced, and then she had been walking away from some meaningless conversation with a half-finished drink in her hand and she had seen him standing there and at once all the sound had stopped. he isn't looking at her. he's angled away from her, but she recognises him all the same: a tall, strong figure, the tousled sweep of his hair, his disciplined and confident posture. does everyone else know? have they found out somehow what this means for the poor Lark of Sistine? is that why they all went so quiet?

ah—no, she can still hear it faintly. music and laughter, muffled like she's far, far underwater, a place where she can't breathe or move or speak. wouldn't that be nice? deep down somewhere he won't find her and can't reach her. but the deafening sound of water in her ears is only the rush of her blood. there isn't anywhere she can hide.

no matter what she says, he's going to be angry. the best thing she can do for herself now is mitigate the damage, and that means walking straight into his grasp like a foolish and unafraid little bird. she has to let the viper wrap its coils around her neck without a flinch so that maybe it won't bite. it's alright. this is the thing she knows how to do best. (everyone here has been so confusing, so exhausting. isn't it nice to have a little familiarity? isn't it better?) she knows: you should always just get the painful part out of the way first, and then deal with the rest as it comes. it feels like walking off a ledge, but she approaches him. ]

Cesi, you're here?

[ the words are accompanied by a familiar young lady at Joonghyuk's side, where she curls a hand around the crook of his elbow. the touch is casual and familiar, her smile wide. something is already wrong: even when she sees his face, Ruby doesn't react with any confusion or recognition. in her other hand, her drink is forgotten. ]

I didn't know—I mean, I hadn't seen... I'm really glad to see you, Brother!

Not at all, come in!

（ she's just finishing up with a neat row of surgical stitches on a boy who cut his arm on jagged metal diving for pearls in the bay. tetanus is a worry here, so she'd done the best she could to pull toxins out of his system with chakra — but it had exhausted her, and left her faced with treating the actual physical wound the old fashioned way. she ties off the last stitch with a complicated knot, cuts it, and she gives the boy a smile as she picks up a dressing and bandage to wrap the wound. ）

See? All done! Now, remember — please keep it dry, and come back to see me in about a week, all right? I'll know whether or not they can come out then.

（ very sternly — ）

I mean it! No swimming! Trust me, I'll know. Now — my friend here is going to watch as I wrap your arm, okay?

（ she gestures rudbeckia forwards, and then proceeds to place the dressing with its absorbent side down, wrapping the bandage — always starting furthest away from the heart and working towards the heart &mdas; to cover it entirely. the issue, she explains as she works, is that if you leave any of the dressing peeking out, it can act as a wick for any blood. ）

[ Joonghyuk is participating in the celebration at his own pace and on his own terms... Which is wallflowering and not pecking at any of the treats or drinks, though he holds a glass in his hand. It stays seated in his palm as a tactic to keep others from hassling him about living a little, as ironic as that saying goes, and to occupy his fretful hand. As much as he deplores eating dishes and treats made by others, he was forced by two clowns he plans to bury later in the day.

Glass can't substitute touch, but that starvation is sated when Rudbeckia comes along to loop around his arm. It isn't welcome, not in the slightest, and the heightened restlessness triggers him to react, yet the grablenuts encourage him to accept this display. Overall, his reaction is neutralized, which he can rationalize to himself that he dislikes that.

He shoots her a look, scrutinizing and incredulous. ]

Rudbeckia de Borgia. [ What are you doing? is what he wanted to ask, but... Wait. Huh? ] I'm not your brother.

[ His younger sister has so much more attitude and audacity than Ruby and she's eleven. ]

[ when Joonghyuk looks at Rudbeckia, there is a brief flash of animal terror in her eyes, though she doesn't recoil from him. the reaction she'd braced herself for doesn't come—no bruising grip around her wrist, no hand settled on her waist to draw her closer. it isn't like Cesare. a cold sweat breaks out under her dress, anxiety prickling all the way down her spine. if he's being this cold, is he expecting her to beg for his affection? something about it bothers her, like a wrong note in a chord. the words he says don't quite register, that low, familiar voice the only thing that sticks: he says he's not... no, but he looks— and he sounds—

there's a dark, heavy pressure weighing down on her that warns her she can't afford the risk it requires to doubt. after all, can she say for certain that Cesare wouldn't use those words? they're true, after all. she can't tell if it's her Shadow whispering in her ear or if it's just her. it doesn't really matter, she supposes. ]

Are you that angry with me? [ this question isn't posed with the sulky attitude of a child or a spoiled little sister wheedling for forgiveness; her voice is clear, and she speaks with grave remorse: ] I'm sorry, Cesare. It's my fault. I really didn't know, so I've just been playing around... I was in the wrong, I'm sorry.

[ there's a dissonance to her demeanour, two overlapping images—her hand trembles where it rests on his arm, but she clutches him tighter. she looks up at him with wide-eyed innocence, absolutely trusting, and her body leans against him in that same casual, comfortable intimacy she approached him with. she apologises; she doesn't ask for forgiveness. ]

[ This came out of nowhere and prompts a look of confusion mixed with disapproval. Has he done anything to deserve this reaction? His general vibe during this festival has neither been rancid nor hostile. No. Cesare—her alleged brother—is the focus of this interaction. In the shifts of her behavior can he imagine what her family life might be. It leaves a bad taste in his mouth, but he's in no place to criticize, not when she doesn't see him or hear his voice as he is.

As she ramps up the familiarity, it gets on his nerves, but the desire for touch continues to dull the edge. He stays where he is, digging his heels in, like this is a stand against perilous waves. A sigh escapes between his lips as he continues to look down at her with his usual expression. ]

... Roleplay isn't one of my interests. [ If this is what it is, but he's getting the picture that Rudbeckia isn't in her right mind. ] I'm Yoo Joonghyuk, not Cesare.

[ No one else. ]

[ despite the persistent sound of Cesare's voice in Rudbeckia's ear, those words can't be misinterpreted. it's enough to disrupt her nightmare. staring at him, her brow furrows with confusion—and then the gaze meeting hers isn't a deep ocean blue, but a cool ashen brown. some clarity returns to her eyes at last, expression slackened by the shock: now she recoils, yanks her hand off of him and goes to shrink back with a high, nervous laugh. ]

S-Signor Joonghyuk?

[ what is wrong with her luck? of all the people to behave like this in front of, it just had to be the most dangerous and the most useful one, someone she wanted very badly to maintain her image in front of. on the other hand—maybe he won't care? if she just apologises for touching him, then surely he can let anything else slide. ]

I... I'm really sorry! You just look a little bit like my eldest brother, and for some reason I— [ started clinging to him like an annoying kid! where's a hole to crawl into when she needs one, he's going to kill her for sure!!! ] I didn't think I'd had that much to drink...

[ sure enough, she checks her glass and it's barely half-emptied, just as she remembers. so what the fuck!! ]

[ after the unexpected reaction she'd had when she was witness to Freya's gruesome poisoning, Ruby had been vaguely concerned that she might go through the same thing again, upon seeing the wounded here—but watching Sakura work, there's nothing. no reminders of the past or nightmarish visions; she doesn't even feel nausea. the boy is only injured, not dead, and it makes all the difference to see him sitting there upright.

she observes over Sakura's shoulder and tries to recall the mandatory first aid lessons she sat through in high school to no avail. if she'd known she would ever be in a situation like this, maybe she would have paid more attention. ]

I understand. [ kind of. well, the important thing is just to remember the way she's told to do it. ] It must be hard... Where I was from, injuries could be healed with holy magic. So I never saw anything like this.

（ once she's finished with the bandage, she gently tucks the wrap in on itself, affixing it in place with a safety pin, and then she shoos the boy out the door with a final round of instructions. it's only then that she gives the girl a sidelong glance — ）

'Holy magic'?

（ it translates strangely to her, something like divine healing, and she's curious just what that entails. ）

[ Despite having picked up the blonde several minutes ago (meaning several minutes of absorbing her stress and anxiety), Kaito's been light on his feet. Unlike most of the other participants in this game of cat and mouse, he had willingly put himself into the position of prey.

Having heard from folks near the entrance of the maze that the occasional bout of violence had broken out between hunters and their quarry, he found himself compelled to participate. After the frustrating, hellish mess that had been the hunt for the lantern(s), he really needed to blow off some steam.

Unexpectedly, it was only a few turned corners into his haystack labyrinth foray that he had run into Ruby. And, predictably, his ever-present protective instincts kicked in. ]

No apologizing.

[ It's not his first time telling her this, nor will it be the last. His voice is firm yet gentle all the same, and as she struggles to catch her breath, he slips into view wearing a faint smile and holding out an opened metal flask. ] Have a drink. It's water. At the very least, your hunter isn't very good at tracking us. I'm pretty sure he just took another wrong turn.

[ Sure, he's derailed a fair bit from his personal agenda within the maze, but the braggadocious seeker harassing Ruby fits well enough as a temporary antagonist.

In other words, he'll settle for seeing him tossed on his ass, even if it's not in a fight. Focusing back on his impromptu charge, Kaito locks eyes with her—and a flash of mischief shines in those sharp golds. ]

It'd be quite rude to leave you behind. After all, turnabout is fair play.

[ A beat; he flashes a smirk while letting his words sink in. ] There are no rules against fed-up prey giving their hunters a touch of comeuppance, y'know.

S̸o̸?̵ ̶D̵o̵ ̵y̷o̷u̵ ̸w̷a̷n̴t̴ ̴t̶o̸ ̵f̷l̷i̵p̴ ̵t̴h̷e̸ ̷s̵c̷r̷i̸p̶t̶ ̴o̸n̷ ̶t̸h̷i̶s̷ ̵d̸i̵p̴s̸h̵i̸t̴?̶

Edited (Actually I also just hate my own words) 2022-10-16 10:06 (UTC)

[ Relief washes over him when this awkward moment has come to pass. He was about to just ditch because he doesn't think he should be responsible for someone else's embarrassment. The air he gives off is annoyed, mildly inconvenienced. ]

You should have been careful. Some of these are enchanted with curses for entertainment, but they could be easily be worse.

[ Which is why Joonghyuk refuses to partake in any sampling of the treats, though it doesn't explain the filled glass in his other hand. The difference is that it's suspiciously full... And he hasn't made any point to verbally note the touching. It appears that he's ignoring that it happened. ]

Is your brother dead?

Ah... I-I see.

[ there is a pause while she levels a pointed stare at the drink in his hand... but she doesn't comment on it, and tips her remaining whiskey out into a plant without a word. it's typical: the one time she decides to do something just because she wants to—just because she had the passing thought that she's dead, so fuck it, why not have a drink?—it turns out to be cursed or poisoned or something. serves her right for letting her guard down, she supposes.

that handsome face of his is impossible to read as ever, but she's surprised: Joonghyuk didn't shove her away and hasn't stormed off even now. so there's still a sliver of hope that this lifeline of hers hasn't snapped just yet. she needs to work hard to maintain it. Ruby makes a show of shucking her embarrassment—shakes her head with such vigour that her golden curls are flung about, slaps both of her hands to her cheeks, and then smiles at Joonghyuk with the full wattage of her brightest smile. ]

No, Cesare is still alive! That's why I was so surprised, you know? [ without a pause, she barrels on, chattering innocently: ] Hey, do you want to go somewhere else, signore? It's a little crowded. I heard there's a place for stargazing, and I'm sure it's quieter there!

You should consider killing him when you return.

[ It is the only reason why he asked at all. Blood ties mean nothing when they are in your way—when they are barely family to you at all, so he says this easily like Cesare is but a roach infesting a space. His expression stays as is despite the violent and possibly blasphemous suggestion, though there's a tint of weariness. Royals kill each other and their family for the throne all the time, don't they? He had his experience as one before.

Ruby can put all her energy in creating an artificial beam at him, but he barely reacts. With care, he places the full glass onto a surface to be taken away, proper despite his demeanor. ]

Where?

[ UM. HOLD ON. getting the fuck out of here is put on pause for a minute because what the fuck just came out of his mouth so casually??? ]

I'm not going to kill my brother?!

[ the reaction is genuine, even if she intends for it to be read as because I'm a good little sister who loves her brother rather than the truth, which is I don't have a fucking death wish. not everyone can be the protagonist like her former husband and just slaughter everyone in their way; there's a reason why Rudbeckia dies at the end of the novel. this is a line she hates to walk, though—she doesn't want to talk about Cesare, doesn't want to put the act on when he isn't even here, but she can't afford to be seen as some abused little girl, either.

Ruby knows that sympathy isn't sustainable. in the long run, victimhood is too high a risk for such low reward. and if she's going to roll over and show her belly to a predator, she has to be prepared to withstand the pain. those particular bruises aren't anything she wants touched. ]

Signor Joonghyuk, I think I've given you the wrong impression...!

[ Should totally just kill your brother? That's what he would do, obviously. Joonghyuk's eyebrows arch as she starts flailing again and scrambling to figure out what facet to present.

Since it seems that he has read the relationship here wrong, he doesn't say more and waits, expecting Rudbeckia to correct him... Not that he thinks it matters. If a dude should be dead, then he should be dead. Simple. ]

[ oh god she thought he would say something dismissive not that she would have to talk more. this is exactly what she didn't want. if she has to say anything like—that they get along well, or that he's a good brother, or that she loves him, then she'll really, seriously be sick. the scant amount of food she's eaten already sits heavy in her stomach. ]

I-If it seemed like I had a strange reaction, it's just because it was such a shock...

[ the impression she's gotten thus far is that Joonghyuk is someone who doesn't really care about other people's problems. everything in the world is probably so straightforward to him, right? he's strong enough to take the brute force approach. in that case, if she babbles like an idiot, shouldn't he lose interest? ]

I mean, my brother is the Cardinal Valentino! He's someone who should be the Pope someday, how could he be dead? Besides that, he's my brother... It was a scary thought and so I was trying really, really hard not to cry in public!

Mm, it's the power of God channelled through the faithful. Priests and paladins train to use it for healing and destroying monsters.

[ she tries to say it casually, the way someone from a modern era might explain the basic idea of electricity; something fundamental to life that you don't actually need to understand in any detail if you're not someone who specialises in it. the truth is that she has no fucking clue how any of the abilities in Sodom and the Holy Grail worked because it never explained anything, and she could hardly ask as Rudbeckia.

thank god her character is an idiot. ]

I don't really know too much about it? [ she twirls a lock of hair around her finger: the indifferent air of someone who grew up with the privilege to ignore her surroundings. ] My oldest brother can use it, but I'm not—ah, I wasn't... part of the clergy, so I never took an interest.

[ I mean... She can also not answer since he isn't outright demanding her to tell him. It seemed she was revving herself up to defend this brother and the state of their familial relationship. Joonghyuk watches her anyway and he can't say he's completely convinced. ]

Plenty of important men get assassinated because they're unpopular and impersonable.

[ This a fact and a funny one considering he does fit into this category, too. Assholes get their asses bitten, even more so when they're powerful. What he finds odd is that she's trying to disguise whatever this is... For what? The guy isn't even here.

Just talk shit. ]

[ gravely, holding up a finger as if to lecture Joonghyuk: ] He's very, very popular.

[ a fact that pains her deeply every time she remembers it. just because he has a handsome face, he has such a crowd of admirers even though his personality is so bad... well, she bets Joonghyuk can probably relate to that. aside from his popularity, he's probably had anyone who would dare to send assassins after him already assassinated. ]

And who would assassinate the Pope's son in the Vatican City?

[ though they're only recently acquainted, already Rudbeckia has found that there's something frightening to her about Kaito in brief moments; this feeling of unsteady footing, like walking on sand. he is kind, but there is also a sharpness, a sly knife-edge to him. the impression of sharp teeth behind his smile. it's a type of danger she's not so familiar with, far more accustomed to men whose tempers boil over the surface.

she calms her racing heart and sips water from the flask he handed her while she half-listens: his meaningless reassurances, as if he actually cares about leaving her behind or not. his cocky posturing, a privilege of the strong. his revenge plan— hah? ]

What... What did you have in mind? [ apprehensive, but not outright rejection. ] I mean, there isn't much I can do...

[ while her mind is overwhelmingly saturated with fear and anxiety, there's a faint, prickling irritation in her mind towards the bastard hunting them down—she isn't opposed. ]

[ Hm.

There's little urgency as their 'hunter' continues to bumble about, so Kaito's happy to break the pacing and whip out a pouch of dried berries to munch on. It gives him a moment to mull over his thoughts—and her emotions.

What's she so scared of? Is it their pursuer? Is it him? Kaito wouldn't wish the torture of being a telepath upon himself, but sometimes he gets really curious. Perhaps there will be time after they've left the maze. ]

Not with that attitude. [ A brief quip, followed by two shakes of his head. ] And I don't mean that to fluff you up. A good plan can include you even if our physical abilities aren't equal. If you don't mind getting a little dirty, that is.

[ Gloved fingers splay out over the tall corn stalks surrounding them. Thin and slender as they are, with such volume they create a deceptively dense thicket—one that is perfectly suitable for hiding. ]

Hide in the maize. Er, maze of maize.

... [ Really? Was that really necessary? ]

You should be able to barely make out the path from behind the corn. I'll lure that bumbling bastard around the corner, and when you see me dart past, stick your leg out after... Mm, two seconds. I imagine it'll be easy to bait him into a breakneck pace after he's wasted so much time trying to pin us down.

Once he's flat on his face, we have some options. Direct confrontation, or disappearing into the maze to lead him around and wear him down. Make him look like an idiot. I'm sure being unable to pull off such an "easy hunt" will do wonders for his ego.

[ The air quotes are about as exaggerated as he can muster. ]

What do you think? If all goes well, this shouldn't require a lot of energy on your part unless you want to take a turn as the bait, in which case you'll have to do a little more running.

[ He doesn't relate to that, actually, because he is unaware that his face gets him some perks. People still want to kill him, unfortunately.

This is an easy question to answer? ]

Those who want power. Those unhappy with the church. Extreme heretics. Those who simply hate him.

—i play the heroine, i play to their sympathies.

「 OCTOBER 」STYGIA, THE HARBORS • SAKURA

「 OCTOBER 」 EVENT THREADS

—THREAD TRACKING.

—KAITO.

—YOO JOONGHYUK. (pre-emptive cw for implied abuse)

cw: injury/wound care

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can't believe you didn't tell me about the mdash typo smh ISA

i legitimately deluded myself into thinking that i replied to this last week I'M SO SORRY LMAO

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yeah i did it deliberately just to humiliate you

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