—i play the heroine, i play to their sympathies.

[appeale]

WHO: rudbeckia de borgia & etc.
WHERE: various locations
WHEN: check subject lines
WHAT: catch-all & overflow log
WARNINGS: will update as needed. see individual threads for specific warnings and mind ruby's character cws

Comments

[salvageable]

[ What gave it away? The stiffness in his shoulders? The awkwardness of his movements? Or maybe it's the way he stares at his book but the pages aren't turning.

He's trying so hard to ignore the fact that he's cuddling on the couch with Ruby (something that he's never really done with anyone before) and using every ounce of his concentration on anything else. When her too close voice breaks through his thoughts, it nearly has him jumping out of his seat. Fortunately, it's only a slight flinch that creaks out of him, and it's then that he realizes he's been stuck on the same page for ages now.

With an embarrassed laugh, he flips to the next page, gaze still boring down on the open book in his hands. ]

You think so? [ Dokja, anyone with eyes can tell. ] I guess I just don't find myself in this position often.

[appeale]

[ Ruby's laughter is soft and nervous. ] Neither do I!

[ not like this. she can't remember ever spending this much time close to someone other than Cesare. maybe there was Iske, the one night she spent with him. neither of them were people that she could ever relax around for even the smallest moment in time. and certainly she's still afraid of Dokja; his unassuming appearance says nothing about his potential for violence. but.

while this might be uncomfortable, anxious pins and needles everywhere she touches him, it's different to the skin-crawling nausea and rabbit-quick heartbeat whenever she felt the heat of Cesare's body along her side, or pressed to her back, like the threat of a white-hot poker held just inches from her skin. this is nothing compared to being forced to sit in his lap during meals. ]

Um, to be honest... [ she leans into Dokja, resting her head against his shoulder. it's too careful and deliberate to be natural, but she is clearly trying very hard. ] I've never even really had any friends before. So, I'm sorry if things are awkward, or I'm too forward sometimes, or just not very good at any of it...

[salvageable]

[ Excuse me, she was forced to sit WHERE...

Anyway, Dokja is trying to be extremely mindful of his placement, stuck to his side of the couch and taking occasional note of the heat coming from their proximity to each other. This really is someone's sick idea of a joke and all the tropes in his stories couldn't have prepared him for dealing with it in person.

So he's extra unprepared when her head drops down against his shoulder, not really paying any attention to the details of how calculated it may have been because it's Dokja and he's stupid with people. ]

It's fine, Ruby. [ Is she the affectionate sort?? ] If it weren't for you, I'd probably be freezing to death in my room right now.

[ Why does it sound like he'd prefer that. ]

[appeale]

[ the lack of enthusiasm in Dokja's tone speaks for him—and yeah, she wouldn't be surprised if he'd rather suffer alone. it's not like she enjoys this either. too bad for him that he's useful to her.

still, she's worried that he will actually run away and leave her to freeze if she doesn't tread carefully. courteous as he has been, he doesn't see her as such a child that her touch can be regarded casually, so clinginess should be a last resort. then, what the hell is the best approach with Kim Dokja...? someone who knows her place? someone easy to deal with— a well-behaved lady who is gracious, generous, and accommodating. it's worth a shot, anyway. ]

I don't want to make you uncomfortable, though. Is there something we can do to make this feel more casual...? [ her thoughtful hum has a musical lilt. ] Ah, would it help if we just chat? You can tell me about the book you're reading, or I can talk about something, if you'd prefer.

[ she stays very still, and doesn't lift her head from Dokja's shoulder. I'm not looking, so make whatever reluctant and long-suffering expressions you want at me. ]

[salvageable]

[ If only he could properly admire Ruby's use of others, having done so himself so many times before both when necessary and not entirely necessary, but the days are bleaker now and Dokja's been spiraling since his arrival to this place. All he can think about now are the whispers in his ear, the way his companions don't seem familiar to him, and with no way to understand them now that he's been taken from the one thing he had known best, it's been difficult.

How he wishes he had Ways of Survival with him now, he thinks as Ruby asks about the book he's reading. It's just another generic fantasy story, but it's the closest thing he has to what he usually consumes, so it's been satisfactory in the meantime...

But he'd rather hear what she has to say, if only to pass on the responsibility of filling the silence in the room they're in to someone who isn't himself. ]

What would you like to talk about?