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[closed] you give me hell but i'll make it
WHO: Team Seven kakashi who
WHERE: Mainly the Gallows, Shadowlands, misc other areas
WHEN: Early to Mid November
WHAT: Sasuke went to jail (shocking), Naruto and Sakura bust him out; later, Sasuke and Naruto reconvene to have a very necessary conversation
WARNINGS: Event-specific CWs including blood, branding, captivity, violence
WHERE: Mainly the Gallows, Shadowlands, misc other areas
WHEN: Early to Mid November
WHAT: Sasuke went to jail (shocking), Naruto and Sakura bust him out; later, Sasuke and Naruto reconvene to have a very necessary conversation
WARNINGS: Event-specific CWs including blood, branding, captivity, violence
@acknowledgement, @craters
The barrier is immaterial, so he doesn't feel it; only the vanishing of chakra, like threads unraveling when he grasps at the weave, tells him what is wrong. He's not overcome easily. It takes five guards and the combined effort of twenty minutes to knock him down prone into the dirt. Whatever sin he's committed in the eyes of the Hierarchy, it must be considerable for them to care this much. He thinks he has been struck at least once over the back of the head, but he hasn't lost consciousness, powerless eyes straining to monitor and memorize his surroundings even through the glassy smear of pain. He is wide awake when they first press the hot iron to his arm ā upon the bicep of his severed left. The sound he makes is through his teeth, half-snarled and livid. The brand aches to the same hard pulse of his heart. Then, mercifully, the world clips out.
Eventually, his mind returns, and with it is the worst headache he's experienced since those first years attempting use of the Sharingan's raw power. He closes his left eye; somehow, though the Rinnegan remains inaccessible behind the barrier that shrouds the Gallows, the dÅjutsu feels like the dull ache of a wound. It must have something to do with its permanent activity. The connection has been blocked but not detached. He notices, next, the shackles on his bare ankles, joints red and inflamed; his clothes are in tatters where he's been dragged across the ground some distance into the iron-wrought bars of a cell; his sword and phone are predictably missing.
Sasuke lifts his head, looking into the ruinous room for clues of the guards who watch him, echoed voices telegraphing their approximate locations. Pain is suppressed to background noise. If it takes time to puzzle a way out of this situation, he has the patience and training to wait.
He's not counting on anyone else's help.]
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Donāt start, he thinks sternly before Kurama can comment on the situation. Itās been a common argument between them for a month now. Iām fine.
Youāre stupid is what you are. The concern is painfully obvious in his bijÅ«ās voice. You know this is going to come to a head. You keep delaying the inevitable, hoping for some miracle thatāll have made the deception worth it. But itās going to hurt them when they find out.
Naruto doesnāt respond, though his mouth twists unhappily at the truth of the words. The dead weight of his repeated failures is beginning to drag on him, unspooling the loose threads of his emotional and mental stability. He canāt remember the last time he felt so tired. At least the war was over in a shockingly brief period; the nightmare of the Netherworld has spanned week after hopeless week. If he doesnāt find evidence soon that everyone can return homeā
It happens abruptly. Neck cartilage shifts and pops loudly as his head snaps up. Sasukeās gone. Just like that, Naruto can no longer sense his best friend through dual resonance, the spiritual connection that has linked them ineffably since the Sage of Six Paths bestowed power upon them both. Before heās consciously aware of moving, the jinchÅ«riki is vaulting out the window of his ramshackle Stygia apartment. Booted feet land light as a cat on the street below, startling pedestrian Restless, and then heās racing at full speed in the direction of the Harbors.]
Close the clinic.
[Bursting into the makeshift space, Naruto stares hard at Sakuraācompletely ignoring the female patient she is with. Said patient shies away from the blond at his tight, aggressive tone, glancing between the two shinobi nervously. A cursory look informs Naruto that the young woman seems to be suffering from hives. Judged against the current circumstances? Unimportant.
(That he would consider very little more important than Sasukeās safety is irrelevant.)]
Sasuke disappeared. He was in the city, but thenā¦
[An impatient and frustrated look is shot at the patient.]
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but instead of replying to him in any verbal manner, she ushers her patient to her feet, pressing a tin of cream in her hands and giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. her doctor's manner stays firmly affixed as she gives the woman a warm smile. ļ¼
Come back in three days, okay? Remember what we discussed about the shellfish.
ļ¼ the woman picks up her things and scampers out past naruto, skirting around him as if in fear. sakura is already peeling out of her long white coat and gloves. she taps out a message on her phone to ask someone else to swing by and supervise just in case, and then she takes naruto firmly by the arm and steers him out of the tent.
her mind is struggling beneath the hawk's cry of old panic and guilt and fear. disappeared... that could mean any number of things, but something capable enough of subduing sasuke beyond naruto's senses... she reaches up to rub her fingers across the byakugÅ, as if reassuring herself of the presence of its deep pool of chakra. ļ¼
I should heal you first, before we do anything else — we'll need you at full strength.
ļ¼ she isn't going to ask about it, she doubts naruto's singular focus on the matter of sasuke would even drive him to answer her. but there'll be time enough for questions later. ļ¼
@acknowledgement
Almost an entire day has passed since Naruto and Sakura found him in the underground passages surrounding the Gallows, rescuing him out of the dark in his injured state. There was little time for conversation in the moment, their minds all honed on the action of the present ā and as he emerged on the other side of the barrier, his powers had returned in a cool rush of chakra. Exhaustion chased quickly after. Sakura had tended to him at a bare minimum; both her and Naruto needed to go back into the caves, to save more of the Restless whom were still imprisoned. He understood that. He hadn't stopped them.
In the time since, however, he's holding to the original promise he'd made Sakura when last they spoke privately. He'd seen the injuries on Naruto's body; no matter the darkness of the cavern, the damage was clear, mottled bruising of wounds in various states of healing. Certainly there existed more beneath the hidden fabric of his friend's clothing. It's the worst he has seen Naruto since he can remember. He's always been aware of the benefits of Naruto's chakra, the healing factor primary among them, as tallying all of his friend's strengths and weaknesses was something he'd begun years ago and maintained ever since. It's his business what sort of condition Naruto is in. Out of the three of them, Naruto is the most important, the most valuable, and he'd decided that day in the valley what his new purpose would be. In the dying wake of his own pale hopes of desolation and solitude, Naruto's dream is his only goal. It is what anchors him to the world.
So to see Naruto that way only demonstrates his own inexcusable failure.
The Shadowlands are a bleak, changeless terrain of gray, interspersed with ruins so commonplace to the Netherworld he barely looks twice now. His destination is a single Door, face emblazoned with his friend's name in neat kanji: Uzumaki Naruto. It took time to locate. In that sea of closed doorways amid countless others, he had searched, had checked every single one until he'd found it.
Here, he waits.]
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Once inside, Sasuke should recognize the view; they stand atop the rough, craggy cliffs that form Hokage Mountain. At the edge twenty paces away, rock has been carved masterfully into the striking likeness of the villageās leaders, past and present. Above, an apocalyptic sky torments the scene with heavy clouds pregnant with tongues of lightning while Konohagakure sleeps restlessly in the distance far below. A sharp eye will pick out the incongruous wooden material of a trapdoor set in an otherwise stony flooring. Presumably, Narutoās Tethers are kept somewhere behind it.
The owner of the space remains silent, a prisoner awaiting his sentence. Though he avoids meeting Sasukeās intense gaze, stomach capsized with guilt and shame, Naruto does study the brunet in search of injuries from yesterdayās misadventure. He stares longer than he should at the stretch of skin where the brand is concealed, mouth carefully closed to conceal low-simmering anger elongating canines. That the Hierarchy would dareā
Naruto. Nowās not the time.
Kuramaās right. Brow furrowed, the jinchÅ«riki wrests his eyes away. His emotions are slow to drain, but thatās been true of his time in this dimension. And now, at last, his teammates understand to what disgraceful extent.]
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If he strayed into the outer terrain of his own Door, would he see the Hokage Mountain in the distance?]
I know what you meant now. [A response to their earlier conversation about their Doors, several days ago now. The same searching gaze passes over the trapdoor; it must be where Naruto's tethers are kept. Out here would be too exposed.] My own Door leads to my childhood home.
[It feels like a necessary offering to Naruto's vulnerability in allowing him inside this place.]
You need to let Sakura heal you. After this. Will you promise me?
[The frown is tight on his mouth, accompanied by furrowed brows, telegraphing the concern he feels more than words can say. He turns to face his friend, eyeing the physical evidence of what Naruto has done without them.]
Weren't you the one who told me I didn't have to bear everything alone? So I don't understand why you're going back on that yourself. [Sasuke isn't angry, though his tone carries that low edge, as always, however he softens it now.] ... No, I can guess. Naruto. You're struggling the same as the rest of us with those darker thoughts and feelings, aren't you?
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I wanna visit, he thinks, finally stirring from the moody misery thatās dogged his heels. It comes as no surprise that Sasuke, like always, serves as a motivator for Naruto. I wanna see where you grew up.
The demandāno, the request for a promise is not answered immediately. He struggles to find the words to explain the feelings that have been building inside him, only for Sasuke to meet him halfway.]
ā¦Yeah, [he admits, dry voice hoarse with thickened emotion, choking him.] Dunno how it got this bad.
[Moving away from the Door, he approaches the edge of the cliff and gazes down at the thousands of buildings below. For a momentāso brief it could be played off as a trick of the eyesāthe distinctive white cloak of the Hokage billows out from behind his form, shadow monstrously huge and oppressive. Then itās gone. Naruto doesnāt seem to have noticed that anything strange has happened.]
I figuredā¦ [A jerky shrug of his shoulders.] ā¦I figured it was my job to take care of things. Itās really arrogant. I get that. But Kakashi-senseiās been training meā
[āto become Nanadaime. Itās only a matter of time, now. Like his father, Naruto will be inaugurated as one of the youngest Hokage.
Except, the issue at hand is so much more.]
ā¦Sometimes, [Naruto continues, and thereās a smile audible in his voice,] it feels as if youāre the only one who ever liked me just the way I was. Before I was worth anything. Even Sakura-chan didnātā¦not until I promised her thatā
[Naruto crosses his arms over his chest awkwardly, the stump of his right one under the left.]
I used to be okay with that. Orā¦I thought I was okay with it. The longer Iām here, thoughā¦ [The stagnant, red sun burns his retinas. Naruto doesnāt blink.] ā¦Startinā to think maybe itās not okay. That lotsa stuff back home wasnāt okay.
[And, so softly that it might go unheard altogether:] I never shouldāve let you leave alone. We shouldāve gone together.
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A frown touches Sasuke's mouth, hidden at his friend's back.]
You aren't so different now than you were then. The difference is you've made people pay attention where before their own problems and insecurities blinded them. Even back then, I don't believe they would have rejected you if they'd known who you truly were, as I saw you. I also don't believe they are ignorant of their own behavior. It is possible to atone.
[What does it mean to be 'worth something'? The actions you commit, the values you hold, the bloodline of your ancestors? All of it, to Sasuke, is arbitrary. Worth can't be measured as simply or as objectively as that. It comes from within ā not from the opinions of someone else.]
You've grown and matured, but that doesn't change the nature of your heart.
[The other boy's influence is beyond whatever reputation he was forced to carry by those in power. And Sasuke believes that those who have mistreated Naruto, just as he once did on his own dark path, can make amends.]
Naruto, turn around. I have to ask you something.
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He rubs absently at his chest where the concealed scarring is the worstāa flicker of warmth sparking there behind his ribcage as Naruto cherishes the quiet regard Sasuke still has for him. āā¦I donāt believe they would have rejected you if theyād known who you truly were, as I saw you,ā and āYouāve grown and matured, but that doesnāt change the nature of your heart,ā echoing softly through his thoughts. In spite of his continued doubt, he smiles. No one will ever see him as Sasuke can, but thatās fine. So long as they remain best friends, as this bond persists between them beyond life and death, Naruto needs nothing else.]
The nature of your heart hasnāt changed either, Sasuke.
[His gaze lingers on the ruinous sky a moment longer before he turns as bidden, smile fading and yet still evident in the fierce light of blue eyes.]
Theyāll get that, one day. And if they donāt, Iāll knock some sense into āem. [A playful wink as if to suggest that heās jokingāexcept Naruto isnāt. If the village refuses to accept Sasuke, heāll do something about it.] In the meantime, you gotta learn to forgive yourself. Iām not making any promises until you try. Weāre in this together, right? So weāll work on stuff together.
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Sasuke steels his own nerves, and then faces forward again, cool mismatched eyes to bright blue.]
The Soulmate bonds are meant to alleviate the affects that Oblivium has on this world and its inhabitants, including us. I've gathered information on what these bonds are like. They are primarily a tool to protect Restless against exactly what has happened to you, as you were overcome by darkness that wouldn't have touched you outside the Netherworld.
[He says nothing of himself, because as much as he may have been experiencing the same from his own 'Shadow', he's kept it under control so far. Naruto's protection is more important; he sees that as his duty.]
It's dangerous, Naruto. You saw what happened in the Barrens. You've been avoiding everyone. You need to find a Soulmate if you have any sincere ambition to leave this place, but I don't expect you'll agree to it with just anyone. So make that bond with me. We already know each other's strengths and weaknesses; you've helped me before, when I couldn't see through the darkness of my own heart. This wouldn't be any different.
[Famous last words.......]
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His feelings on the Soulmate bond in the Netherworld have been complicated from the start, in part due to willful ignorance on the subject and in part due to the influence of his Shadow. Given the implications of the name, Naruto canāt help believing that such a bond should be restricted to those in loveāsomething his Shadow has repeatedly reinforced the jinchÅ«riki will never know. į“Ņį“į“Ź į“ŹŹ, į“”Źį“ į“į“į“Źį“ Źį“į“ į“ į“ į“į“É“sį“į“Ź ŹÉŖį“į“ Źį“į“? Hinata, allegedly, and yet Naruto feels little beyond a platonic affection for the softspoken HyÅ«ga. Since meeting them, he compares his own lacking love life to the incredible, whirlwind romance between his parents. Maybe such a partnership just isnāt meant for him. Maybe it canāt be.
But even if he didnāt already foster these misgivings about the Soulmate bond, the approach Sasuke takes now would have put Naruto off.]
Soā¦thatās how you feel about me, huh. [Pride wounded, hurt blisters into anger.] And the way youāre talkingā¦ It sounds like a business transaction between strangers. You agree to cover my weaknesses, [the word is spat,] and in return, the nonexistent debt between us is cleared. Is that right?
This bond should be something special, bastard! What about Sakura-chan!?
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What about Sakura? If you're worried about her feelings, then you should know she's the one who told me to approach you first.
[It was Sakura's idea, that he would be able to balance Naruto's emotions as incurred by the Shadow, that they are uniquely qualified to handle each other in their worst states. And it was Sasuke who had denied it, concerned that his presence would only make his friend even more volatile. It seems he may have been right.]
You're not a stranger. I don't see why covering each other's weaknesses is a bad thing.
[Isn't that what teammates are supposed to do? The confusion is a sharp, black, twisting thing within him, quickly flaming into anger and his own deeper hurt, irrational though it may be. So it is proven, and his tentative step forward to establish their team dynamic again is unnecessary. ššš«š®ššØ š§šØ š„šØš§š šš« š¬ššš¬ š”š¢š¦ šš¬ š šššš¦š¦ššš šš šš„š„. Then again, this is the Soulmate bond. The truth is perhaps closer to the fact that Naruto does not see him as special in the way he would a romantic connection.
He should have seen this coming. It was stupid of him to ask at all.]
If you won't with me, then you should with Sakura. I know she'd do it.
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But itās not about covering each otherās weaknesses! [he argues, tone laden with a bitter edge.] Not the way youāre trying to sell it! Youāre not treating me like an equal or friend. Youāre treating me like a mission. You said it yourselfāIām weak. Iām dangerous. Iām a liability!
[An errant hand scrapes through his hair furiously, ripping out strands along the way.]
Dunno why Iām surprised by any of this. You both have been gossiping about me ever since we got here! She keeps telling me I can depend on you two, but neither of you trust me at all! So now itās come down to thisā¦if I donāt bond with you, I should bond with my other babysitter. Except Sakura-chanās made it clearāIām not the one she wants that kind of connection with! You are!
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[He's hidden the extent of this just the same, but now it comes out in a rush of anger, the burden of carrying these thoughts the last several weeks. At times it it still difficult to untangle what is the supposed Shadow of this dimension, and what is simply him and what he's brought here as part of his soul. If there's any difference at all.]
I speak to you as much as I speak to her. There's no scheme behind your back, and if you imagine as much, then it isn't an issue of trust on my end. My conversations with Sakura concern only our survival here, and that survival depends on you. Protecting you. Seeing that you return to Konoha. You're needed, Naruto.
[He stands, frigidly, where he first entered the space behind Naruto's Door, eyes pinned intensely upon his friend.]
I've never returned Sakura's feelings. She should be aware of that. If it wasn't clear to you, then you truly don't understand me at all. [Cold words, but the frustration of the moment snaps it out of him. Not once has he expressed interest in their mutual teammate. How much more plainly does it need to be said?] I have no privilege to wait around for this special connection you describe. Do any of us? You're living in a fantasy.
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Maybe he isnāt cut out for Hokage, after all.]
If you think, [he begins, voice trembling with barely suppressed rage around canines grown thick and sharp,] youāre not neededā¦
[Whisker markings deepen. His self-control is a thin thread unspooling wildly. Kurama urges him to calm down, advice that falls on willfully deaf ears.]
ā¦then you never understood me in the first place.
[A fantasy is all heās had to keep him going since childhood.
Sasuke has always been part of that fantasy.
Like hell Naruto is going to wake up.]
Bastard!
[Armed with only claws for nails, the blond shinobi hurls himself bodily at Sasuke and throws them both down onto the uneven, dusty rocks. The setting is nostalgic. Fueled by his misplaced anger and doubt, struggling to keep bijū chakra from exploding out of him, Naruto wrestles his best friend as if he can beat understanding into Sasuke with only one arm and a rapidly fraying dream.]
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He's struck across the arm held out as a barrier, momentum enough to carry them into a hard, sideways roll. To break them apart, Sasuke delivers a hard kick to the other boy's side that intends to throw him off and across the rocky earth. With this breathing space regained, he climbs to knees, expression gritted.]
You know it's different.
[If he's needed, it isn't in the same way Naruto is. It never will be.]
Get a hold of yourself. Or are you going to let that side of you win? It's just more proof you need to accept the bond with someone before it's too late.